Decoding Boys: Supporting Our Sons in Rapidly Changing World

The St. John Parent Association, in partnership with ParentMap, provided an opportunity to hear Dr. Cara Natterson, pediatrician and bestselling author, speaks on April 22, 20206.

Link to this and all previous ParentEd videos: https://vimeo.com/showcase/parentedtalks-25-26 

Access password: edTalks*2526

Key Takeaways:

  • Prioritize Open Conversations: There is an urgent need to empower boys through the same level of open conversation recently focused on girls to address concerning trends in their self-image, mental well-being, and academics.
  • Recognize Early Puberty and Behavioral Signs: Puberty is starting earlier for boys, typically around ages 9-10, and parents should be aware that mood swings during this time. Boy puberty is often manifested as intense rage, but also as withdrawal into silence, which is overlooked.
  • Take an Active Role in Sexual Health Education: With the average age of first pornography exposure at 12, parents must overcome their own awkwardness to become primary educators on healthy relationships and safe digital habits.
  • Utilize Connection Strategies: To avoid triggering shutdowns, parents should use “side-by-side” positioning (like talking in the car), or while giving a foot-rub before bed time – as face-to-face engagement can feel too intense. Parents can also engage by learning to like their teen’s hobbies like video games. Using humor especially if you are the “butt of the joke” is helpful in building vulnerability.
  • Focus on Individual Strengths and Mentors: For boys struggling in traditional school settings or with social withdrawal, parents should be relentless in finding outside areas such as clubs or hobbies or even starting a small business where their specific temperaments and strengths can blossom.

Additional resources

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